A Letter Home
by Wendymypooh
Summary: The Kid writes a difficult letter home to his childhood sweetheart, telling her of his new life with the PX, and his new love.


It was dark and cool inside the bunkhouse as Kid lay listening to the soft sounds of his fellow riders as they slept. There was something comforting in the musical chorus of mumbling, gritting teeth, creaking of wood and rustling of cloth that came from the bunks surrounding his. He had become adjusted after being alone for so long after he had left Manassas to, a sound. Each sound uniquely different, as were his fellow riders and himself, but seemed to fit together nevertheless. So much like the way he and the six other riders he had come to know not only as friends, but also as family.

Lou. The one small word was enough to bring a smile to his face and his heart to skip a beat. So much had happened between them over the past several months. Something he had not foreseen after losing his heart briefly to another woman on his trek had found to be far more special than his childhood sweetheart he had left behind in Manassas.

This latter woman was on his mind that night. He had not written home to her in nearly a year. Ever since, he had arrived at the Sweetwater Pony Express Station and met Lou. He knew that she deserved to know what had become of him…deserved to know what why he had not written in so long...but he was loathe to sit down and write a letter he knew she would receive with such joy and would know such pain by the time she was finished.

With a weary sigh, Kid climbed out of his bunk, careful not to jostle the bunk above and awaken Lou. He silently opened his drawer in the bureau he shared with Lou and got out the tablet of paper and pencil he had stored there and moved over to the table and sat down on the end closest to the cookstove. From his position there was just enough firelight flickering through the door of the cookstove for him to see to write.

He sat silently, pencil held poised in his right hand, as he tried to compose his thoughts...

'Dear Doritha,  
I hope this letter finds you well. I am sorry for the long time that has passed since I've written to you last. So much has happened over the past several months I don't know where to start in telling you about them. The money you were so kind enough to give to me to travel ran out when I reached Missouri. Do not fret though. I managed just fine...taking on odd jobs and such for room and board in each new town that I came to. I stayed for a spell in Possum Flats, working a farm for a young widow who had only recently lost her husband. I moved on after her brother showed up to help her with the chores.

The time between me leaving Missouri and arriving here in Sweetwater, was a long spell and I didn't have any means really to write. I've found a good job working as a Pony Express rider and have made some fine friends…an adoptive family really. They are all great, but so different from each other…in temperaments …backgrounds, skin color...but we fit together like pieces in one of those wooden puzzles your Papa brought you back from one trip to Boston one year. Do you remember?

Anyways...Doritha it pains me to have to say this to you...but I'm asking you to let me out of the promise that you forced me to make when I left. You know I only promised it to make you stop crying. How I hate seeing you cry. I do care for you Doritha...you've been a real good friend all these years and I'll always hold you in high regard...but I'm not in love with you and never have been. I do intend to pay you back for your generosity and will include the first payment with this letter. I hope you find the love you seek from me in another man. One who will make you happy? Take care. Sincerely yours, Kid.'

Kid let out a sigh as he reread the letter he had just written, wondering if there was anything, he could have written different. If he could lessen her pain somehow, but in the end realized that nothing short of him taking it all back and sending for her would assuage her pain. He folded the solitary piece of paper into threes, picked up the tablet and pencil and moved back to the bureau where he stored all three before settling back into his bunk. He would send the letter out with Cody in the morning. His mind somewhat at ease for finally being done with the telling, Kid soon fell fast asleep.


End file.
